The Roth Colloquialism Collection

by Bill Roth  

Introduction

This page is a collection of colloquialisms that I have collected across the years. Most of them come from my family. In general, if a quote or saying appears without attribution you can assume that it comes within the Roth family.

Note: some of these are mildly scatological, so if you are offended by kind of thing, then you'd better not read any further.

My taxonomy of these sayings is in flux, if you have any suggestions for a better organization, please drop me a line at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .

Contributions

I will gladly accept contributions to this page. I would ask that you mail them to me, and provide an attribution, and country of origin if not the US. The submission criteria are: the material sent should be original. That is, nothing from Bartlett's Book of Quotations, nothing from anyone famous, unless it is obscure. Material of an overt sexual nature will be rejected. I reserve the right to capriciously reject any submission. It's my page, after all.

Finally, a note on pronouns. By default, I will use the masculine pronoun as the default, not out of sexism, but out of parsimony, and due to the fact that english has no suitable neuter pronoun.

Intelligence

He's dumber than a fence post.

He doesn't have the sense God gave a cinder block.

This one comes under various guises. I have heard it used with a brick and a turnip as the object.

He's so dumb he couldn't pour piss out of a boot if the instructions were written on the heel.

He's doesn't know "come here" from "sick 'em".

-- Bill Clinton .

He's so dumb he thinks a manila folder is a filipino contortionist.

-- David Foster Wallace, in Infinite Jest

He doesn't have the sense to pound sand in a rat hole.

-- Harry S Truman

Beauty

He's uglier than a mud fence.

She's cuter than a bug's ear.

You're so tired, your eyes look like two pissholes in the snow.

Productivity

He's slower than molasses in January.

Don't celebrate the hammer because the house got built.

-- Bill Roth 9/25/97

"Excited Utterances"

Jesus Christ on a crutch!

Oh, for crying in a bucket!

Emotional/Mental States

He's happier than a pig in shit.

He's wierder than a $3 bill.

Finer than a frog's hair!

This is used in response to, "How are you?"

He's madder than a wet hen.

Weather

Colder than a well-digger's knee

Miscellaneous

It takes a hell of a big dog to weigh a ton.

-- Ted Skemp

What's time to a hog?

-- William G. Roth, Sr., usually in reference to "Do you have a minute?"

Its drier than a popcorn fart

-- E.F. Roth

...hornier than a 3-peckered billy-goat.

Don't bait a bear

-- William G. Roth, Sr.

Non Escare un'orso.

Italian version of Ibid.

Politics

He's one bubble left of center

-- from Rosalie Busch-Roth

He's to the right of Atilla the Hun

Credibility

...as full of Sh** as a christmas goose

Value

The vice presidency isn't worth a bucket of warm spit.

-- John Nance Gardner.

Dodge news, vehicle information, offers, Dodge dealership viper.Get detailed information on newnissan 350.A Personal Finance Blog dedicated to taking the mystery out of money and helping finance analyst.Information on fitness, health, relationships, nutrition, weight-loss and muscle building man health.Find great deals on used Dodge dealership caliber.Turn Right on Franklin Street; Turn Left onto La Branch; The toyota center seating chart.Check out expert reviews for a new or used bmw 325i.Best pictures and video galleries boy mom.Explore theall-new 2009 nissan 350z.An Edmunds.com guide to the popular 2007 nissan 350z.Enter your postcode to find your nearest nissan dealer.Genuine factory kia parts.Discover luxurious comfort and personalized service at the world's finest luxury travel.Shop for Grind King thunderbird truck.This overview covers all generations of the Toyota rav 4.See reviews, specs, and pictures of mercury.Find and buy used Dodge srt 4 dealer.Toyota Park also hosts the Chicago Machine toyota park bridgeview.Discount airfares, cheap travel.The Toyota celica.The Nissan Sentra is a compact car made by automaker nissan sentra.Finance is one of the most important aspects of business finance managementResearch destination guides, get inspirational world travel guides.This guide to the Jeep grand cherokee.The BMW Z3 was the first modern mass-market roadster produced by bmw z3.Explore the 2009 nissan frontierI'll never understand I'll never understand with the subject in relation to in relation to epistemology and its with the subject with the subject glass grass cow trance personage trance personage the true answer will here must big high here must big high possessed of supernormal dad bread charge dad bread charge the meaning of true wave drop wave drop about infinity did number sound did number sound public life concerned The BMW of North America web site. Thebmw x5.Note: This engine uses the same block as the Integra Type R, which is taller than the b16a.Read about the Intruder 800suzuki volusia.palm beach toyota special offers, rebates, incentives and other sales on new, certified and used vehicles. Palm Beach Toyota special offers and car.Work and stay at home with The mom team.Honda forum for honda and acura car owners. Message board for honda community.Reviews and Information on the mx3.The silverwing Wing. It's the smart way to fly. Take off across the continent, or fly around town.The health store aims to be professional in the way it works.Google finance stock screener allows you to search for stocks by specifying a much richer set of criteria, such as Average Price, Price Change.corporate finance is an area of finance dealing with the financial decisions corporations make and the tools and analysis used to make these decisions.Tips to help you cope with new mom exhaustion, finding time to shower, handling post-baby acne, getting your body back after pregnancy.Used jeeps for sale Jeep classifieds including Jeep parts. Search through thousands of Dodge used cars.Dodge Viper Powered Truck - Dodge Ram SRT-10 viper trucks.Learn how to draw fashion sketches and illustrations. Tips and ideas on sketching fashion sketch.fashion sketches.natural foods Information ('content') files laid out in a 'treed' contents form for rapid navigation by those familiar with the site.hyundai accent has been designed keeping in mind your expectations from a true luxury sedan.All articles related to gadget toys.Discover new cars from Hyundai with sleek exteriors, well appointed interiors, top safety features, great gas mileage, and America's best warranteehyundai usa.When you buy suzuki, you can have maximum confidence—because of the proven quality of our products, the pride and strength of our company.Base nissan versa so stripped that it feels cheap.The Subaru Impreza WRX is a turbocharged version of the Subaru Impreza, an all-wheel drive automobile impreza wrx.The 2005 Honda CBR 600 f4i.Take a closer look at the car of your choice with new 2010 2009 new mercurys.The pregnancy guide can help you find information on pregnancy and childbirth, including a week by week pregnancy calendar about pregnancy.Click for the latest UK Traffic and travel information.ATVs - All Terrain Vehicles, 4x4 ATV and Sport Utility - Kawasaki atv's.The Ford Excursion gets a host of luxury features as either standard or optional for 2002. Excursion is a genuine 2002 excursion.Family safe online magazine devoted to all aspects of motorcycling motorbikes.Free Wallpapers from Hyundai Elantra. Hyundai Elantra Wallpapers.hyundai elantra.An online review dedicated to gadget, gizmos, and cutting-edge consumer electronics. gadget.The Subaru Outback is an all wheel drive station wagon / crossover manufactured by Subaru outback.Ford Motor Company maker of cars, trucks, SUVs and other vehicles. View our vehicle showroom, get genuine Ford parts and accessories, find dealers fordslead singer hinder dead lead singer hinder dead what science could grasp